Posted by sid on January 28, 2002, at 20:01:45
In reply to benefits of therapy? (longish), posted by m3 on January 28, 2002, at 18:56:52
Actually, some therapists openly annouce the type of therapy they're into. Some CBT clinics exist for example (cognitive-behavioral therapy). If that'S what you're looking for, then it's easy to find.
A concrete example (I did CBT and use it all the time now):
with chronic depression since I was 13, I used to feel bad about things as if there was a fault in me. I'd feel bad and guilty all the time. Now I can detach from things/situations and not hurt myself anymore than the actual situation. I stop the hurt. For example, my brother-in-law used to make me feel bad all the time, making nasty comments and sexually harrassing me. Now he still tries but he can't get to me. I ask myself if I did something to deserve this treatment. The answer is no because I want to avoid conflict with him, so I'm especially careful not to bother him. So if he treats me nadly it's his problem. If anything, I'm extra nice to him as long as he does not do anything unpleasant to me. Then, I avoid him when I see that he tries to put me down, I change room, I go talk to someone else. If need be, I tell him off. Bottom line is: I don't let it get to me anymore because I am fine, he has no reason to treat me badly, I don't deserve to be treated like this. I used to have low self-esteem and now, for the 1st time in my adult life (I'm 34), I do have self-esteem.The steps I can see in what I do (in this specific example):
1st: feeling bad because someone treats me badly
2nd: realization of actual situation (I don't deserve this)
3rd: action about it (I talk back, go somewhere else, etc...)
4th: beneficial feelings, or absence of bad feelings as there would otherwise be (I don't dwell on it, I move on to better things and people, trying to enjoy life as much as I can)Sometimes he still gets to me, which is normal, but I try very hard, ad usually succeed, to not stay there and wallow in the hurt. I am aware of my worth, my strength, and I use it.
It was hard at the beginning, then became easier, now it's practically automatic: I treat myself better.
Other ex: all-or-nothing thinking. I use to think in black and white and felt I had no options ahead of me in general. Of course! Life is not in black and white. I've learned to think in more subtle ways and discriminate options as well as "convex combinations" of options (different tones of grey).
The idea is that over time and because of depression, your brain functions in a certain way which has become self-defeating to you. By conciensciously (sp?) changing your thining pattern and behavior, you can "remap" (for lack of a better word) how your brain functions. 1st you learn to catch yourself thinking or doing self-defeating things, then you move on to do something about it. I always felt "stuck" during my depression, and I was, because I had thought and behavior patterns that kept me at the same place (depression!). I undid some of those patterns and got out of depression. It took a long time mind you, I lost patience many times, thought about suicide a lot, thought that life was boring to death for the longest time, etc... Now I am upbeat and think that life is an adventure worth living... It took time and efforts, but I feel good now.
The benefits of therapy are long term too because I still use CBT all the time. I think it helps to avoid further episodes of major depression.
Voilą. That was a long answer, which I hope can help you. I did not use meds for my major depression, but I would recommend CBT and meds simultaneously, to speed up the recovery process.
poster:sid
thread:17403
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020125/msgs/17409.html