Posted by mair on November 26, 2001, at 7:49:45
In reply to Re: Suicide, posted by Cass on November 25, 2001, at 22:46:32
>Cass - As you can see, lots of people here have been in your shoes. I'm not sure there's much that I can add which would be much different from what others have said except this: when I felt the most suicidal, the last person I wanted to talk to was my therapist because I wasn't sure I wanted to be stopped, and I tended to think that suicide was preferable to being hospitalized. Once my therapist started bringing up the subject of hospitalization (on her own) I started feeling like I needed to actively disguise how bad things really were. I was fortunate in that a slight meds change made a huge difference and at least I got better enough to keep myself out of the hospital. However the lengthy process I went through with my therapist, analyzing (forever it seemed) what happened and why I hadn't called her and how I felt about her maybe wanting to put me in the hospital was extremely valuable and really helped me to start working with her much more effectively. I now look back on that time and I know I never want to feel like that again, but I do see positives in it too. There can be silver linings in even the worst of circumstances.
Please call your pdoc and please keep posting here to let us know how you're doing.