Posted by Wendy B. on September 7, 2001, at 9:11:19
In reply to Re: Sar's ups and downs... » Wendy B., posted by sar on September 6, 2001, at 23:17:31
> i initially misread that as "did she just know you were weird and having problems?" heh heh...Willow is an intuitive one, isn't she though? (either way you read it)
heh heh! well, you are weird! but in a totally groovy kind of way... yeah, i love willow, she really hits the nail on the head sometimes with her pointy questions. good like that...
> i wrote a letter to the psychoanalyst whom i called a bitch explaining why a check was not enclosed and apologizing for the name-calling. a week later, a fresh bill arrived in the mail. i wrote her a longer letter explaining why a check *still* wasn't enclosed, requesting at the end that she not contact me. i haven't heard from her, and it's been a few weeks. :)
double :) :)
> ah, wendy, thank you, you're kind...i've been posting with a guy named mitch over on PB about depakote and he seems to think i should start with neurontin instead. the thread is fairly long and he seems to know his stuff,
oh, yes, i've been keeping track of the 'sar-mitch chronicles,' but keeping my distance, because i'm on neurontin, and don't want everyone i love to just be on the same thing i'm on... i think i suggested this to you a while back, but that's ok... i think it would be *very* reasonable for the shrink to prescribe you an anti-convulsant like neurontin *first,* before they try something stronger like depakote. i'm not a doctor, but if i were one, i'd try something easier and with fewer side-effects first, rather than going with the depakote right off the bat. just IMHO...
>so next time i see my pdoc (on the 11th) i'm going to discuss that as an alternative to depakote, though he may want to just keep me on the prozac and klonopin for now.
not if you tell him about the work stuff and that you are either laughing your butt off or crying hysterically about 24-7. demand relief. they have to do something...
> that sounds lovely...i'm a merlot girl myself...nudge me as much as you want, at least you're nice about it, not threatening to fire me or screaming "you're an alcoholic" (as my parents are fond of doing). how is the job at the vineyards? are you in canada, wendy? where are you?
i like merlot, too, and we'll probably be bottling that soon, too. it's fascinating working at this vineyard, though the pay sucks. i grew up on a farm in NY state, apples, cherries, peaches, etc. so the vineyard is right up my alley. i live in NY, but the town will have to remain a secret... (paranoia!). e-mail me at my (shitty little) yahoo account, and i'll tell you, and wail about my most recent voyage into hell: email@example.com
(the yahoo thing's another whole rant)
> the work situation is really bizarre. i can usually get about 75% of my words out without them being garbled in laughter, but i'd say the average human being hovers around 97%.
..... not the human beings i know......
>the newest pdoc did dx me as bp II (along with histrionic/borderline personality disorders) (uh!) and he's a big cheese in my city, chairman of this and that, very well-paid and renowned...
i was wondering: what is the date you're seeing him again?
>but i was *drunk* when he made that diagnosis, he was so busy that he was 3 hours late to the appointment so i kept running out for tallboys, then going back in to see if he'd arrived yet...(normally i wouldn't accept a doc being 3 hours late, but i met this guy when i was in the loony bin and i really like him, and i did make him promise to not keep me waiting like that again.)
you mean he didn't know you were drunk?? if not, why not, and then maybe tell him next time that you were drunk last time he saw you... at least give him the chance to modify the dx. you don't want him to say: "stop drinking, go to 12-step, blah blah blah". think about it, though, honey... he can't help you if he doesn't know what's up wichoo...
> sounds like you're having a good night!
oh, i most certainly was! headache this a.m., though, wine's a bit young...
>how are *you,* babe? i gotta keep tabs on you, it's only fair...
oh, i dunno... sort of felt like i'm doing the 'sheltered workshop' thing, as i go up and down rows of grape vines, thinning out the vines... this means clipping off the green grape clusters, so all the energy of the plant goes into the ones which are purple already, so they have as high a sugar content as possible before harvest... do they have sheltered workshops in texas? like: half work, half occupational therapy? i'm going up and down the rows, and humming a little van morrison tune, and looking down at the lake, just thinking how beautiful it all is, and how much i like not being in an office anymore, stuck in middle management... although it's easy to romanticize the vineyard thing... reality is: the workers don't own it (they just get a lot of free or subsidized vino), and the capitalists win yet again... (remember from Monty Python & the Holy Grail: 'what about the workers?') i'll never have the money to get into such an investment-hog of a business... so i'm out in the sunshine, taking care of plants, happy about being there and doing that, and depressed at the same time, thinking about workers rights, cesar chavez and the california grape boycott of the '60s, getting poison on my hands from working with the grapevines......... etc. etc. etc.
(that's how i'm doing, thanks for asking...)