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Re: Martha's Meth Recipe

Posted by Mark H. on November 14, 2000, at 19:55:21

In reply to Re: Help for the Queen Bee-add., posted by S. Howard on November 11, 2000, at 14:47:24

I found this in the Quarterly Lumptonian for Summer '92:

"I hate to drive down to Washington to buy crack, don't you? I never remember whether I'm supposed to hold out one finger or two, not to mention how much to tip, and the commute! So I've invited my dear friend Marion Berry to share some lovely home-made alternatives with us today."

"Before you got here, I bought four or five cases of generic No-Doz at the local warehouse purchasing club, and I've been popping them out of their little foil covers while waiting for you to arrive. Later we're going to stay up all night and make silver-petaled flowers out of the packaging in a sparkling holiday arrangement sure to please everyone."

"After crushing all the tablets on an organic granite mortar, you can see that Marion is estimating the amount of Elmer's glue needed pretty much by feel, then making little pyramids and irregular squares to resemble slightly off-white rocks.

Once they're dry -- it takes about two hours -- you're done! Wasn't that easy? If you plan to make these into stocking stuffers, wrap each piece in a corner of clear plastic wrap for that authentic look. Your holiday guests will think you've gone the extra mile for them this year."




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