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Re: Lump Baskets S. Howard

Posted by Greg on November 10, 2000, at 20:59:27

In reply to Re: Lump Baskets, posted by S. Howard on November 10, 2000, at 20:27:16


Thanks for the warm welcome, I really appreciate it! Your Lump Basket idea is borderlining on sheer genious! Might it be possible for you to concoct a Zyprexa/Neurontin drink for me? My meds are the one thing that I will drag myself from the couch for. I envision one of those beer hats that you see at all the football games, a can on either side and the straw in the mouth. Then I never have to leave the couch....My company bought me a laptop thinking that it would make me more productive, little did they know... One thing you might consider adding to the basket is a lifetime membership to Webvan's home delivery service, the single greatest invention in Lumptonian history me thinks. Perhaps Shar should document this for historical purposes?

Oh well, I have to eat dinner now. Who can I get to chew my food for me?

Hugs by proxy,

> First, I would like to welcome Greg back to the fold. If such a hue and cry had been raised when I quit my last job, I would probably be working there now for free. Not!! Anyway, you get the idea - from our couches, from underneath our blankets, our chocolate-coated fingers extend in a V-for-victory sign. You have returned just in time for my clever idea to make us all wealthy.
> I have grown more thoughtful while imbibing in the National Drink (after I finally got someone to remove the cork). Imagine yourself recieving the following Lump Basket:
> -Gift certificate for free delivery pizza
> -Back scratcher
> -Ben & Jerrys coupons
> -Caller ID, for those lagging lumps without (I would give up my refrigerator before Caller ID)
> -Tarot cards or Rune stones, for those active times
> -Flannel undies
> -A little bell for ringing when you want stuff
> -"Dry shampoo" hair spray
> -Double-stuff Oreos (make SURE you got milk)
> A holiday gift basket for lumps with IRS (Irritating Relative Syndrome) should include a silver flask of the finest something (I suggest Tequila Rose or Jagermeister, well chilled), earphones, and maybe some voodoo dolls with pins.
> Deluxe gift baskets for lumps with irritating young relatives will include a recording of Pat Boone singing Christmas songs. Lumps with irritating old relatives can get a recording of
> the Best of AC/DC. Either way, you have your flask and earphones. If that still doesn't clear the house, I intend to perfect my recipe of "Mulled Depakote/Seroquel Wine for Company" in time for the holidays.
> All my best - Gracie




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