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Re: worried about another woman

Posted by caraher on April 12, 2008, at 11:39:24

In reply to worried about another woman, posted by hoolahoop on April 9, 2008, at 8:17:21

>i do trust my bf but i dont trust HER

You don't have to trust her. It's between you and your fiance. Even if this other woman disappeared that's one down and a few hundred million women to go as far as potential rivals, if that's how you see it. So forget about what she does and says. You can't control that; you can't do more than ask your fiance to take your needs into account in how or whether he continues this friendship.

It's clear that you're not OK with the kind of attention he's receiving, and it's your right to tell him that this is tearing you up and, at the very least, he needs to ask her to drop the overtly sexual flirting. And of course, it could be that you can't live with even a more innocent friendship, in which case you really need to tell him he can't have both you and this long-distance relationship (whatever its character).

> how do i cope with this?

It's hard. You've got to lay your cards on the table with the one person from whom you have a right to expect not merely respect, but an abiding concern for your happiness. If he can't or won't do that you should probably thank this other woman for showing you in advance what to expect *before* you marry your boyfriend.


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poster:caraher thread:822344
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20071110/msgs/822853.html