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Re: A story for the book » Daisym

Posted by Dinah on February 25, 2012, at 10:51:51

In reply to A story for the book, posted by Daisym on February 23, 2012, at 0:32:58

I think I'm still in awe of how your therapist handled it.

At least two distressing things happened. There was a disruption in your therapeutic space. When the fire drill happened at my office, I didn't take it at all well even though it wasn't my therapist's fault. He now suggests alternate days when a fire drill is scheduled.

And then your therapist's other life was mentioned. And more literally than usual, the awareness of that life intruded into your therapy space. I think maybe he shouldn't have said the word "wife" in his explanation for exactly that reason. Talk about a Freudian situation!

As to what I would do. I suppose I'd be upset, express my feelings for a while, and then it would become part of my therapy story or narrative. That the fact that he has an outside life, where he's not *your* therapist but someone's husband or someone's father, occasionally does intrude in the sacred therapeutic space. Sometimes more literally than others. My therapy story is always transforming. Sometimes in better ways, more often in bad or mundane ways. I generally incorporate it into my world view and perhaps even sometimes find it amusing.

My therapist was talking about the five languages of love yesterday. And used his wife and him as an example. Barf!!! At least he didn't say either of them had the "physical touch" as one of their two primary languages. I'd have had to say "EEWWWW!!!! IIIIICCCCCKKKK! Therapist mommy, don't say those things!!" I'm afraid. But do I really need to know that his two are words of affirmation and gift receiving and that hers are quality time and acts of service? A metaphorical unwanted intrusion. :)

 

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