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Re: love and therapy

Posted by emmanuel98 on February 22, 2012, at 19:32:49

In reply to Re: love and therapy emmanuel98, posted by Solstice on February 21, 2012, at 20:25:35

He's never said I love you either, though I've told him I love him, usually with tears in my eyes. But he has said, I don't love you in the same way and there's a way in which I love you too. It's just I have such a hard time with trusting unconditional love. I got stuck, because of my incompetent parents, at Erickson's trust vs. mistrust stage -- i.e, the first stage of development, toddlers and infants.

> This is really beautiful. My therapist has never said the words "I love you," but I feel very loved and cared for within the relationship. I believe I matter. I believe that during times of my deterioration, I have been held in my therapist's mind. It doesn't feel like romantic love, and I've never had trouble with that issue. It does feel somewhat like parental love. Maybe there's something about the commitment a therapist makes to the profession - to 'the code' of it - that is kind of parental. A reasonably decent parent is incapable of thinking in terms of being able to dump or get rid of their role as a parent. Likewise, a good therapist feels 'bound' do their client's well-being. My therapist's commitment in tending to and sustaining what we call my 'tether' is what feels like love to me. Therapeutic love... that's what he has for you.. and it's warm and safe, like a cocoon.
> Solstice




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