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Nightmares and hallucinations?

Posted by JayMac on November 19, 2008, at 13:52:14

I told my T about an interesting experience I had on Sunday. This what happened: I met this person and while she was speaking, I started to see a clear image of a skeleton. It lingered for a few seconds. Then, I saw her face with skin but it still looked bony and skeletal. I got really scared. It took a couple minutes for reality to kick in and see her as how everyone else sees her. It's one of the weirdest moments of my life. This image was so clear, lucid, detailed, but horrifying.

Then.... I told my T about my nightmares I had a few days before meeting that lady. Well, after discussing my dreams for a couple minutes we agreed that they are in relation to the terror I feel.

My T's next comment was something like this: "I think you need to speak with your pdoc. The nightmares and the vision of skeleton may be related to your medication." I was like, WTF? I'm hallucinating?!!!? I told her I didn't like that interpretation. She repeated herself, "You really need to speak with your pdoc. We need to figure out if this hallucination and the dreams are related, in any way, to your medication." I told her that I didn't want to hear her say that. I said that I'm already messed up, I don't want another diagnosis. She said that we just need understand what's going on better.

I see my pdoc tomorrow, but I'm scared. What if I am hallucinating?! I got 2 new meds 6 weeks ago, in addition to the 2 I have been on for a couple years, but I haven't had any side effects from the new 2. I don't know what to think. I hate sitting with this information and not knowing what my pdoc will say. I'm getting paranoid that maybe I did actually hallucinate.

I could sense it was getting time and I really wanted to leave. The intense feelings I was experiencing were more than I felt I could handle at the moment, and I just wanted to leave. It was time, so it's not like she could have spent more minutes with me. She asked how I was feeling. I said I felt like crying because I don't want to become schizophrenic (my mom is schizophrenic). I already have enough going on. I cried a little, then it was time for me to go. She asked how I was, I told her that I was fine, but obviously not. Then I left.

I don't know what I felt like posting this. I'm sure none of you have experienced something like this, I just wanted to get this out.


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poster:JayMac thread:864011
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081104/msgs/864011.html