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Re: Bad place, bad place (miscarriage TMI) + LONG » FindingMyDesire

Posted by seldomseen on October 5, 2008, at 14:04:49

In reply to Bad place, bad place (miscarriage TMI) + LONG, posted by FindingMyDesire on October 5, 2008, at 4:24:17

I'm so very sorry that you are having to endure all this right now.

I completely understand how you would feel alone. I know I would.

I'm glad you decided to post and let us know what is going on with you. I've found babble on many occasions to be a wonderful support network. Yeah, it is online and all. But most of us here on the psych board get IT you know?

The physical pain you are going through will pass - eventually even the memory of it will fade. It's just far too acute, though, when you are in the middle of it.

The emotional pain that you are in I also understand. I understand the anger at your T. To say that it sucks that she is physically gone right now when you need her the most is an understatement. You probably didn't realize it, but I just gave her a virtual whack.

The emotional space between us and our T's definately ebbs and flows and it hurts - a lot. It all seems very arbitrary sometimes. They're here, they're gone and right in the middle of it is the big fat therapeutic boundary. I don't know how any of us manage it actually.

But we do. I've been in therapy a long time and still feel little pangs of that ebb and flow myself, but I will definately disagree that the only place this can end up is with you getting hurt.

There are no guarentees of course, but if I can work out a stable relationship with my T anyone can. It's a lot of work, it's a lot of talking and talking and talking, but it's worth it.

Eventually, it becomes as though the emotional space between you is negligible. You don't merge into the same person obviously, but you do develop a very strong alliance.

She may be the one with whom this happens, she may not be. I don't know.

Again, I am very glad you posted. I'm sending you peace.

Seldom.

 

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