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Re: I saw my old T today Dinah

Posted by Happyflower on May 18, 2008, at 17:18:55

In reply to Re: I saw my old T today Happyflower, posted by Dinah on May 18, 2008, at 16:32:56

Thanks Dinah,

It is true, I still love him, and the reason why I don't want to now is because he hurt me very deeply. If that didn't happen, maybe things would have been okay. But I told my T this week that there were red flags very much before I quit and that I should of quit therapy a long time before I did, but I was attached.

It seems like my new T is trying to get me to say or to the point that I wouldn't have gotten to the point with him(new T) without what happened with my old T. And he says I have learned so much about boundaries and etc. of what not to do when I am a therapist. But I tell him I would have rather of learned from a book on this one.

I feel so conflicted, I want to hug him and stop on his foot at the same time. But what is hard to admit even now, my heart still flutters when I see him, even if I want to stomp on his foot. I want to hate him but I can't. I still look for him at the gym and feel disappointed when he isn't there. But yet when I do see him I have an attitude of trying to ignore him. I guess I want him to feel some hurt too.




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