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Re: movie Sybil? I am scared, I want my T*trigge

Posted by Happyflower on May 2, 2008, at 23:40:24

In reply to movie Sybil? I am scared, I want my T*triggers*, posted by Happyflower on May 2, 2008, at 23:03:49

My grandma was the only one who loved me too, just like Sybil. I know I am not Sybil, but I went through stuff simular.

Mom always said I was stupid and klutzy. She would accidentally hurt me too. Make me look so stupid so she could feel so good because she was better than me she said.
I remember reading those little Bible's we got in 6th grade for answers. It gave me none. People said to pry when things go bad, well it never helped me, bad things still happened. I couldn't pray hard enough. Why would any God allow to happen what happened to me? I just don't understand how to love a God who created such evil that hurt me.
I remember wishing I was dead, I even told my kinder garden teacher that I was going to die soon. But I couldn't wish hard enough for that to happen.
I saw my mom torture my brother's body parts, I didn't even know how much those parts hurt boys. But the screams, I remember, the anger he has inside for her you could hear in his yells, in his face. I hated her.
I wanted to save my little brother, but I couldn't because I knew I would be next, I wanted to hide so bad, but that would only make it worse. She could do this and minutes later answer the phone like she was Mrs. Beaver Clever. She worked at the school as a teacher Aid, everyone thought my mom was so cool, they didn't know what I knew.
I guess when I saw her act nice I really felt bad because I most really be bad for her to get mad and do those things to me.
The soap in the mouth, Palmolive Brand green. Washing your mouth out with soup has a whole different meaning in my house. She did vinegar too, and it burns, I can feel it. She pulled my hair out where you couldn't tell, she twisted my arms and thumbs to threaten me. Why are mothers so mean?


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poster:Happyflower thread:826927
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