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Re: no hugs, no nothing » Dinah

Posted by sunnydays on March 22, 2008, at 12:08:48

In reply to Re: no hugs, no nothing » sunnydays, posted by Dinah on March 22, 2008, at 11:21:06

> That s*cks.
>
> I'd be furious that he listened to your mother's paranoia and changed because of it. You're not a minor. It's none of your mother's business really.

**** No, but he said he highly doubts anything would happen, but that he needs to be able to protect himself if anything were to happen. She is unstable enough that she could take a notion to report it to some licensing board or other. I understand why he needs to, I just hate it. I feel like he doesn't trust me anymore. I know that it's that he doesn't trust my mom's actions, but it hurts.

>
> And you were honest with him, and this is the result. What an inducement to be honest with him. :(

**** Well, that part I don't mind I don't think. I'm glad I was honest. If he really feels he needs to, then I would want him to do that.

>
> I understand his concerns, having had this happen before. But he was cleared last time, I assume. And accepting a certain amount of risk is part of his career choice.

**** He was cleared last time - I'm not sure it even went to any big thing other than his supervisor. He is accepting a risk and says it's the only thing that's going to change, it's just in case, just to protect himself. And it's only voice recording at least, not video. I think I'd totally freak if it were video.

>
> Maybe I'm being overly negative because of my very strong feelings about having my sessions recorded in any way. I don't even like his making notes of more than a few words. I would hate being recorded. I say some pretty idiotic things in therapy, because I know I'm free to say idiotic things in therapy. I wouldn't feel free to do that if I were being taped.

*** That's why I couldn't talk at first. And I hate the idea that someone else might possibly hear what I say too. But he said even if something were to happen, my mom would never hear the tapes, it would only be a judge that would hear them, at the school's lawyer I'm at would work really hard for the tapes to not even be let in at all.

>
> So maybe I'm projecting that part on you, and you don't feel nearly as bad about it. I know lots of clients agree to being taped and don't mind it at all.

**** I hate it a lot. I know he still cares about me, and when I looked up after I'd probably been just sobbing for 10 minutes straight, he looked very sad and had tears in his eyes. I know he hates to see it hurt me. But there also is a lot of it that has to do with my feelings toward my mom this is bringing up. It just hurts.

>
> I'm so sorry, Sunny, that his fears have led your therapy to change.


**** Me too. I don't know if calling him is ok anymore. I assume it is since he didn't say otherwise, but wouldn't he want to tape that too? I don't know. He said it's just a simple, one-step thing, just taping, but it feels like a ginormous thing that changes everything. I also assume he has discussed it with his supervisor and they both agree, so I trust that he has dealt with his own issues around it.

sunnydays


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