Psycho-Babble Psychology | about psychological treatments | Framed
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venting versus change

Posted by wishingstar on March 2, 2008, at 18:49:54

What to do when therapy is only good for venting and not much more? Does anyone ever feel this way? I can bring up the most "real" or most important issues, talk about them, but once I'm done getting out the story and how I feel about it, or the issue that was triggered (whatever it might be), there's just nothing else to say. And it's on to the next topic. I dont want to take away from the value of having someone to vent to.. it IS helpful.. but I'm not getting any better. I feel like I'm dealing with the day to day crises, not the real issues. If that makes sense. I'm not seriously depressed these days, so crisis management doesnt need to be a priority like it has been in the past.

I dont know what to do with this. I've been with my current T for almost a year and a half now. I cant say I totally trust her not to disappear, but not because of anything shes done. However, I DO feel like I'm being totally honest when i tell her what's going on. I'm not hiding anything. But she isnt the first therapist I've felt this way with either.. that all I'm doing is venting.

I guess there's a difference between supportive therapy and actual change-oriented therapy? I appreciate the support, but I need help making change. I'm willing to do the work, but I dont know how to fix it.

I've approached this issue with her in the past (and with other therapists). I'm planning to do it again soon. But it's very scary, as I had a bad experience with an unethical therapist before my current one. Long story, but it very much hurt my ability to trust and ask for what i need.

I did have one therapist who i didnt feel this way with. We connected and I could feel real growth happening. It was great. But she's 2 hours away and with my job, it's not possible for me to see her. My point is just that I know what I'm looking for exists. I think it's what I hear a lot of you write about regularly.




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