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OK NEW one....EMOTIONS

Posted by Muffled on November 29, 2007, at 23:17:11

Emotions come, emotions go.
I honestly didnt used to know that. I thot they came, and just kept comming over and over and getting bigger and bigger until I either S injure or do something nuts, or get high, or SOMEthing, to make it go away.
I used to think there was real evil inside, I could FEEL it...sigh...it was just my emotions....I didn't know.
As a teen, sometimes I'd lie in bed a night, so afraid, cuz I had this choking feeling in my throat, and I thot there was something wrong with my throat, and i wondered, if it closed right up, would I be able to get to my parents bedroom to tell them to call an ambulance? or would they find me lying dead in the hall cuz I couldn't get there, so now I know, guess what...yup, my throat felt that way cuz I was having sad emotion....but I didn't know.
I think mebbe when I was little I had too many emotions, and for a variety of reasons must have suppressed them. My T says I have emotions. I know I have emotions NOW, but I still sometimes get them mixed up.
I don't cry. I don't feel hurt bout any of my 'stuff'. Sometimes a blast of emotion hits me, but I make it go away fast somehow. I only recently allowed as one day I was having a hard time.....I guess I meant with my emotions....
I am afraid of emotions I think.
Right now, the way I am in this moment....I don't undertand emotions much, they don't hurt who I am right now.
I am very mixed up about emotions.
I feel like there is some HUGE thing I am completely not 'getting'.
I have learned SO MUCH the last few years of T.
There was SO MUCH I didn't know....
I still have so much to learn.
How is this emotions stuff for you guys???
How does it feel and stuff?
ANYTHING. I am confused so much here.
Thank you.
M

 

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poster:Muffled thread:797752
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