Psycho-Babble Psychology | about psychological treatments | Framed
This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | List of forums | Search | FAQ

Re: confusing feelings about T...not good fit?

Posted by muffled on October 11, 2007, at 14:55:07

In reply to confusing feelings about T...not good fit?, posted by B2chica on October 11, 2007, at 12:41:38

**OMG B2, your experience has SO many similarities to mine...its actually freaky...

> ok, feelings about T confusing me a bit.
> and i keep thinking that maybe i need to just stop and/or find someone else...which does not appeal to me right now...way too hard and honestly i think that would just be it for me and therapy. and that's not an angry threat or anything, its just how i feel about things now.

**yup, I the same..
>
> but here's whats going on in my head as of late.
> i actually worked hard and got past my issues with absolutely NOT wanting a female T, and am seeing female now. i've grown to trust and yes even like my T. :^)
> "ya, she's ok 4 a grl" says teen.

*I could not work with a MALE! LOL. My toughie would be WAAAAAAY confrontational!

> but im upset and worried now. i dont know if its more me or teen.,...maybe both are thinking of just stopping T altogether.

*yeah....getting kinda freaky eh?

> well since the anger teen carries and expresses has ALWAYS scared me i was scared/worried to let it out... i told T that many many times. T kept saying that its ok to express her anger there (as long as i dont hit her or anything)....well teen did start to express. she yells and tenses up, and hits me sometimes....

**Sigh....I haven't expressed rage, I am afraid too.
I keep warning my T, never show fear...:-(
I keep asking T....are you afraid of me....:-(
I do this quite regularly, whenever I feel the anger bubbling.

> on tuesday i kept switching between me, littleone and teen...very hard but teen out mostly.
> anyway teen bluntly asked T if she even knew what she was doing (re me...them...us). i think cuz me and teen don't know whats going on or can control things that we think she not really sure what she's doing. -teen thinks that she just wants to have a patient with DD or would like to think she knows what she's doing but doesn't really? (though i do believe her to be pretty smart, not one that 'thinks' their smart, but really is)

*this is where you so much the same as me....I doubt my T too....whenever its getting tough...I doubt her. I sent her a fax yesterday asking 'CAN you handle me????' etc...

> so one thing led to another and T ended up saying that its not that she doesn't like teen, its that teen is sometimes intimidating and i don't know if she said scared but i think she said 'unsettles' her. Teens first reaction was 'well good', though she didnt' say that....but soon...it bothered her. teen told T that she would never hurt anyone only herself. but now it really bothering teen. she thinks that T doesn't know what to do with and therefore doens't want to deal with her. shes feeling REALLY rejected and i think she's shutting down. attitude, like she's not gonna go again.

**:-( Now see, that is my great fear :-(
That my T will show fear of me :-(
That would be the end I suspect of any T relationship.
I could nor bear to have her fear me :-(
But if the anger comes out...I'm not sure what I would do?
I don't think I would physically hurt her, but I might try and scare her, to make her go away...heaven help her if she ever touches me in that state...or tries to lock me in....:-( The whole think frankly scares the crap out of me :-(
If these are the thots teen is having, no wonder she is shutting down. Maybe she needs to talk to T bout this. This is a good post, maybe you can bring it in. I would also mention to T, that she should work on teen FIRST, because I think teen would likely be a GREAT help with that kid...IMHO only...
>
> she's also upset cuz when little one tells memories and stuff T is really supportive and gentle...when teen reminded her that she got hurt too and re-told/reminded couple things T didn't seem as gentle more like "ya I remember you told me that one"...kinda casual (not direct quote, but what teen interpreted). i think teen was restating cuz she wanted more response from her? she feels that when littleone talks, T has sympathy for her and when teen talks, T thinks that teen should have controlled situation better and that 'stuff happens' and she'll get over it, or (and this is the big one) that what happened really wasnt that big a deal.

**Yup, reckon Teen really needs to do some talking and explain her position, or if teen is too angry and having a tough time communicating, maybe you can help her explain?

> -now. T Never said anything like that or I (b2) would stop immediately. BUT that is Exactly how teen is seeing/feeling things.

*Good for you for being so aware. And this is the thing that REALLY builds T, its COMMUNICATION, its talking bout all that kinda stuff. Working it out, and solving miscommunication.

> THEN, since T gave littleone hug same session...of course teen pushed that away, but she really wanted it herself i think. but then again, she'd probly never accept one.

*Ya we want hugs too, and tears, but we not allowed either.
But I think validation would go FAR with teen, and RESPECT for her, and her abilities.

> so i (b2) can't even tell T that teen wants hug too cuz teen would push her away, i dont' know what to do with that either.

*Teens not ready for hug proly. Hopefully that time will come. teen proly needs other stuff first.
> b2c
>
>
> and she won't be quiet in my head if i don't include this that she said.

*Now this is SO like me. I add stuff to e-mails just to shut my people up.

> SEE<,THIS IS WHY I WILL ONLY TALK TO GUYS...CUZ THEY KNOW HOW TO REACT....THEY KNOW WHAT I NEED. THAT'S WHAT I GET FOR F*CK*NG TRUSTING A GIRL! women only know how to be GOOD WITH CRYING PEOPLE...well maybe i need someone STRONG who will yell back? and maybe NOT..well i don't f*ck*ng know I"M NOT the damn therapist!
> BUT i DON"T want to be around someone who DOESN'T WANT TO DEAL WITH ME!!!!!!
> b2t

**Glad to see you teen!
Maybe give that stupid woman T a chance.
Maybe with YOUR help she can learn.
Cuz she DON'T know it all. She is learning too. Nobody is all the same, each person id diff, so T goto get to know you and what you want/need. And T can (hopefully) help you figger this stuff.
Man you good at talking I think.
OK...so....
F*ck*ng stupid, MY T , f*ck*ng hose bag T she dumb *ss T....but mebbe I kinda like her too.
But she dumb *ss is what I say. ROFL she SAY she tough OMG TOUGH, f*ck man she GOT NO CLUE bout tough man, ohhh one of these days man, I'll show her fear, she don't know sh*t from squat.
THATS WHAT I SAY.
But I spose I learning to keep in line like some suck hole. One day. One day....
F*ck*ng damn straight.
HA!

 

Thread

 

Post a new follow-up

Your message only Include above post


Notify the administrators

They will then review this post with the posting guidelines in mind.

To contact them about something other than this post, please use this form instead.

 

Start a new thread

 
Google
dr-bob.org www
Search options and examples
[amazon] for
in

This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | FAQ
Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:muffled thread:788496
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071009/msgs/788518.html