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Re: things don't feel right » Poet

Posted by llurpsienoodle on September 16, 2007, at 21:03:06

In reply to Re: things don't feel right » LlurpsieNoodle, posted by Poet on September 16, 2007, at 14:11:57

Hiya poet

>I'm feeling this way because I finished my classes in July and have convinced myself that I should have a high paying job in that field. Have your feelings of not having what you think you should have become more intensified since you got your doctorate?
>

well, I've been somewhat unsatisfied in my scholarly pursuits, thus the possibility of staying in academia was not appealing on a good day and nauseating on a bad day. Things have intensified since I got a little distance. I feel more settled since I decided what I want to do with my life (about 5 weeks ago). I still have to make it happen, but I'm taking a post-doc training class to see if it's for me. I hope things work out.

But yeah, T is right, I am definitely still trying things out. I feel like I've been following this groove for my entire life and then it ended abruptly leaving me alone and static in an empty field without landmarks. Terrifying.

Xanax helped. better than the alternatives, and has a shorter halflife than self-injury.

T said that where I work is not who I am, but something I do. (very different things). How do you feel about that- is your job YOU, or is it just something you DO?

In abstract terms... fine, T, sure I get it. But in real life, it's hard to separate our "selves" from what we find ourselves doing all day.

-Ll


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