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Weird -- transference and approval and abandonment

Posted by Racer on September 3, 2007, at 14:50:34

OK, so my T messed up right before her vacation, and "lost" my appointment. So, I had a rough time of it, mostly feeling as though I was the one at fault, and that it was terrible of me to be upset, that I should have been OK with it, etc. And it brought home to me that {ulp} I needed her.

We talked about it in my last session, and somehow it's worse now.

The best I can describe it is feeling kinda creeping and submissive, as though I have to win back her approval, her liking for me. And I feel very clingy, which is very frightening for me. There's a small part that says, "Better take a vacation from therapy until you get over it -- otherwise, she'll fire you." (Gee, I wonder where all this crapage comes from?) There's another part that says, "Oh, for heaven's sake -- get a grip!" But there's also the biggest part, just a maelstrom of emotions, screaming, "I need you! Where are you?" I certainly wasn't aware of that before, so I don't know how it was triggered, quite. That is, I don't know the mechanism...

Has anyone else had anything like this come up? Been this discombobulated by something that happened?

And can someone please email me the bug-fix patch for this? As far as I know, I'm running Adult Female version American Baby Boomer 2.0.





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