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Re: do I talk about my family of origin? **abuse trig* LlurpsieNoodle

Posted by RealMe on August 30, 2007, at 22:07:38

In reply to do I talk about my family of origin? **abuse trig*, posted by LlurpsieNoodle on August 30, 2007, at 18:14:27

Well I don't think the meds are hindering you. Most of the time, I just talk about horrific stuff in a matter of fact tone of voice. Last session when I was talking about why can't he say if he likes me or not, my therapist, he wouldn't answer me and said he needed to know more about what was behind my question. Why is this coming up, and why is it important. I must have had a funny look on my face, and he asked me if I didn't have the answer in my heart and my gut. I was puzzled, and he said for me to get out of my head and go to my heart. I had a hard time, and he then wondered if I just couldn't go there. I tried, and I was able to get out of my damn head and "felt" yes he does like me, and I said this is what I felt, and he acknowledged this was so, that he does like me.

I guess I say this because I know I need to get out of my head in order to deal with painful stuff, and that means I go to my gut and heart and leave all the "mind-fxxking" behind. So easy to be rational and logical. But it is getting in the way. Tomorrow morning I will try to go to my heart and gut, and I think I can as I did a dry run by myself in the bathroom last night. Crap, how stupid is that. "Lets see; can I think about the past with emotion?" Yes, but it is awful painful, and I had becoming a blubbering idiot in therapy. I have told him I never cry, and I hate that I have with him. He said, "but it is okay; this is the place" or something to that effect. AGGGGGH.

So, can you get out of your head???

Take care and have fun with your class/classes and whatever else is part of your postdoc.





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