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Re: do I talk about my family of origin? **abuse trig* LlurpsieNoodle

Posted by DAisym on August 30, 2007, at 20:05:45

In reply to do I talk about my family of origin? **abuse trig*, posted by LlurpsieNoodle on August 30, 2007, at 18:14:27

Gosh - there are so many conflicting things I want to say to you.

I guess first -- nope, you don't HAVE to drag it all out and "deal" with it, whatever the he$$ that means! (I keep demanding a definition for dealing with stuf and working through it. How thick is this wall I'm working through?!) I think allowing yourself some stability for awhile is really an OK thing to do. Just because you feel together right now doesn't mean you have to push yourself so hard. It seems to me that you've felt shakey on and off, so this might not be time to get into this work.

OR - it might. If things are pushing up, and it sounds like they might be, you can let them come up. But you need (please do this) to create some safety for yourself. This means having a support network, a solid therapy schedule, meds and an emergency plan. It means being willing to take it a little at a time and not push through it to "prove" to yourself or anyone else that you can. (This is the hardest lesson for me to remember, though I believe it whole heartly for someone else.) Telling the stories might mean telling them a bunch of different ways - without emotion, with tears, with anger, with understanding, with shame and with disbelief. I sometimes feel like I'm boring my therapist to death with the same stuff over and over again. But he says he hears something different each time. And we work on different dark corners a little at a time.

So how is that for rotten advice? Don't do it or Do it...But I think this is something you really should talk with your therapist about at length. What are the things that are likely to happen, for you, when you begin to feel these memories. And the answer maybe be that you don't really have a choice - they are coming up no matter what you do.

I'm sorry for little Lurpsie and what she suffered. I'm not trying to silence her, just protect her a little. I love what your therapist said - it really was very cool.

 

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poster:DAisym thread:779801
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