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obsessed 'mother'

Posted by B2chica on April 30, 2007, at 12:47:04

hi all. been quite a while since i've been here. but unfortunately i need some help/advice from you'all.
i can't meet with my T till wednesday and my anxiety has skyrocketed.
since my pregnancy my mother has been all over me like we're best friends. well whatever right. after i had my little girl, she's been rampid about coming over to see her. well i've been VERY understanding and have so far let her come over once a week (WHICH IS WAY TOO MUCH MOTHER FOR ME) but i would like my daughter to have a grandparent. well, the old 'mother' is starting to resurface. she's becoming obsessed about seeing my little one. when she does hold her she won't ever give her back, i ALWAYS have to take her out of her arms to get her back. she act to me like i NEVER ALLOW her to see her granddaughter, she makes passive aggressive comments to my daughter (who is only a couple months old and LUCKILY can't understand anything) but she whispers, your mommy (me) never lets grandma (her) see you. "do you like daddy better or grandma?" and once i heard her say "i thought you'd be walking before i'd get to see you again".
this last weekend i went over to their house to help them figure out on their computer how to look at the pictures i've sent them of my little one (being nice i thought) and she was mad that i didn't bring my daughter! she was REALLY upset at me. then i mentioned that "you act like i NEVER let you see her, 'yesterday' you saw her all day and held her for at LEAST an hour. she yelled back "That's NOT ENOUGH!" i haven't seen her that freaked out since i was a teenager. this lady is OBSESSED with my daughter. she is trying to sneak over to the house whenever to see her. i've told her taking her to daycare is hard on me so i need as much time with her as possible, so maybe only on the weekends i'll bring her over. but it's apparently not enough.
please, please what do i do?
i feel like if i push harder, she gets more crazed. to give you an idea, i am going to notify the daycare about "grandma may be stopping by" and to notify me immediately. i am three inches away from taking out a restraining order. seriously. before when she was upset i thought well i'll just let her see her even though i don't like her, but it seems to be making it worse. the more she sees her the more she wants her.
now i'm worried that she's going to completely flip out and i do NOT trust my daughter in her hands. now more than ever...

my fathers coming over tomorrow night for some mechanical fixing stuff with my husband and i KNOW she will sneak along expecting to hold my daughter, so i'm going to take her out shopping or something...but i feel like i'm getting chased out of my own home. i wanted to confront her/my dad and just say, no but my hubby says not too...
what do you think?
b2.


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Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:B2chica thread:754656
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070419/msgs/754656.html