Posted by Honore on March 26, 2007, at 11:05:44
In reply to Dinah, posted by gazo on March 26, 2007, at 10:55:28
I think they let th eprocess unfold, because the process is so different for everyone.
If a T started to explain transference to you, for example, he would have to do a textbook analysis, because there a different schools of thought about transference-- plus you won't really understand until you're in the grip of it.
I do think they could be much more upfront.
And it is completely inappropriate to be confronting people in the third appointment-- that was quite insensitive, overreaching, and actually suggested poor training or ability in doing therapy.
But ultimately, you really do have to go through it-- and hope that your T can make the specifics meaningful and react appropriately at any time with support, or even confrontation (only after there's a lot of trust and connection built up), or even practical suggestions, or-- well whatever.
It's the "whateverness" of therapy that makes it hard to explain beforehand. And even after and during-- cause life is pretty much a mystery, even to Ts, although they do, if any good, know more about helping, and relating in a good way, than most other people.
It is frustrating and hard-- lots of time-- enough to make you scream-- but I do ultimately think it's hard to avoid that part of it.
(But it shouldn't be right at the beginning, definitely-- unless it's a very exigent time when sometimes people make very intense, immediate connections-- or unless you like me are the type of person who does that anyway.)
Good luck with your new T, though. Let us know how it goes.