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Re: ok-Mebbe this will help others too...

Posted by muffled on October 22, 2006, at 23:11:40

In reply to Re: ok-Mebbe this will help others too... » muffled, posted by Lindenblüte on October 22, 2006, at 9:11:17

> I don't know if this is an appropriate place to say that I envy you for having different voices inside of you.

**Thank-you. Its not all bad. i've had some proud moments over my inside kids :-)
> I wish my different moods, motives, reactions, etc had some kind of organization.

**Ah, thats the wonder of inside people! It all makes sense....sort of!!!!LOL! Actually its confusing as hell! But sometimes when I figure out stuff it makes me LAUGH, cuz my i. kids ARE kids, and they can be so funny. Imagine having getting JEALOUS over other ones, all in one person! Good God, its nuts!!!LOL!
> I'm going to make a classical music analogy-
> learning a Mozart violin concerto. Just me and my violin and some notes. I play the notes nicely. I follow the printed directions on the page... all is okey-dokey.
> My teacher says: Mozart's PASSION was to write opera. Even in his instrumental work, there is opera. Listen to these different phrases (in the violin concerto). Who are THESE characters?
> One phrase belongs to the heroine- a soprano. There's also a joker- the tenor, and a darker voice, the villain. All in my single violin part.

***Wow, this is SO cool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> It's up to me to decide where one voice interrupts the other, and who behaves how with whom. Once I could figure it out, the music had so much more energy, meaning, color...

***The only thing I would change in this wonderful analogy, is that its NOT up to you to decide where one voice interrupts the other...the voices are their own. You can't control them really. Only up to a point. They ARE themselves. Most definately.
So mebbe it could be said you are interpreting from the music what the voices are expressing to you. And thru their different ways og being, you are able to get to know who is who in the music, and then tease them out more fully as you play and grow to understand them....
> I wish my own thoughts were so organized. But then, I don't have a genius like Mozart planning out my thoughts in advance... Perhaps I cling too tightly to the notion of a single unified self. I know that conciousness is fragmented, even in the most normal mediocre minds, but somehow, we create this powerful illusion of having ONE voice, ONE self, despite evidence to the contrary.

***Yes it been said that ALL have 'people' inside.
> I think you're brave to admit that there are conflicting characters in your inner "opera"

***It was not brave. I would never have admitted it normally. But it was God who very clearly showed me Franchesca :-)
It was VERY clear. And very clearly of God.
So if God Himself showed me, then it must be OK.
I could write a book on the many amazing things I think of (if I could just keep anything in my head for more than 10 secs!) that stem from the wonder of the initial discovery of Fran. Its just been SO COOL.
THATS why I have been able to so completely be accepting of my 'people'.
And as I get to know them, I care for them more. Cuz they ARE people.
They have their own 'stuff'. We don't always agree. We fight. I don't want any part of some stuff. Kids get hurt and mad. And on it goes....
And they are me. We are we.
And thats just fine by me.





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