Psycho-Babble Psychology | about psychological treatments | Framed
This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | List of forums | Search | FAQ

Re: frightful row

Posted by muffled on April 18, 2006, at 22:36:21

In reply to Re: frightful row » muffled, posted by milly on April 18, 2006, at 16:04:41

> ** partly that but also there is a tendancy for him to be able to 'be there' for others but not actually 'present' for me. Plus he has had a hard time with my reaction to my faith (or rather the destruction of it)When I really needed it, I couldn't find it and I felt so utterly utterly alone.

***I've been taught that it is the job of US people to express Gods love. Where was hubby?
Didn't Jesus say something like 'why have you forsaken me?' or some such thing when He was on the cross?
Gods just weaving you into who He needs you to be. Not all easy. Jesus wept tears of blood.
This world is fallen and so full of evil. God gave us free will and us humans have gone wild with it.
Do you have an inside child? Listen to her if you do.
So sorry you have lost your faith at this time. God will always be faithful. He is with me and i just don't understand it????????????
OK sermon over..... ;-0

> Yes but I have been so used to accepting that everything was probably my fault and now since therapy I am much more opinionated and unable to accept things which he is finding hard to cope with

***HA!!!!!!!!!!His quiet little lamb is turning into a tiger!!!!!!!!!!! Ha! GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!!

> I have really been trying today since I read your post and he noticed and asked if I was after something!!!!

***ROFL!!!! I've had the same happen with my man!!!!!!!
>
> yep I got the teenage one but haven't actually read it yet!!
>
> > However, I am making the large assumption that you DO love him. Mebbe you don't?
>
> ** Ok that stung! I DO love him, he is a good man he deserves better than me, everyone thinks the sun shines out his *ss and must be a saint to cope with me!

***OMG! out his *ss!!!!!!!!You-the preachers wife!!!!!!ROFLITIPMP!!!!!!!!You my kinda lady! LOL!!!!
And by the by, he DON'T deserve bettern you. Thats just putting yourself down. He's lucky to have you. I'm quite sure hubby is not perfect himself.......he may go wild one day....who the hell knows?????

but during therapy it became apparent that alot of my 'love' is based on gratitude. He knows nothing of the rape, he believes I was 'pure' but I honestly thought it was tatooed on my head and so when he asked me to marry him i jumped at it as I was so amazed that anyone would want 'damaged goods'. Also I though for once my M&D would approve of something about me!

*** does he know now???????????????????
And you are not damaged goods any more than I was used merchandise. Thats just negative b*llshit.
This where I started to wonder if you loved hubby or not, thats why I asked, cuz I didn't want to assume you did.
I never saw no mention of you caring for him.....I'm sorry if I shouldn't have said that :-(

> I DO love him but therapy has given me a little self worth, my T wanted to spend time with me not because I was funny or because I could provide anything for him but simply because I was ME and that was amazing to be seen as me, not the nurse, not the ministers wife, not the girls mum, not the one embroiled in the scandal at school just ME
> Thanks I needed that wake up call, I DO love him

***Yeah, thats goto be hard. I been living all my life feeling I a leper exuding badness, go figger.
I'm glad your discovering yourself. To me you seem to be a very cool person.
What did your T have to say about your hubby not knowing about the rape?
Why doesn't he know?
Its not your fault.
You were assaulted.
If he's religious and all, he should be into mercy and kindness you might think? Bound to be a shock if you not told him. But then mebbe it'd proly be more about the not telling than about the assault itself.
I hope I'm not messing you up somehow. Just giving my oftentimes stupid opinion, but mebbe it'll stimulate some thot....?
Anyhow, sorry its hard. I guess it must be hard for our hubbys as we change and go thru our 'stuff' :-(
Dunno
Dunno
Dunno,
You great ((Milly)),
Take care,
muffled

 

Thread

 

Post a new follow-up

Your message only Include above post


Notify the administrators

They will then review this post with the posting guidelines in mind.

To contact them about something other than this post, please use this form instead.

 

Start a new thread

 
Google
dr-bob.org www
Search options and examples
[amazon] for
in

This thread | Show all | Post follow-up | Start new thread | FAQ
Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:muffled thread:633909
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060406/msgs/634634.html