Posted by sleepygirl on December 22, 2005, at 22:45:05
In reply to Re: Gift Giving » orchid, posted by daisym on December 22, 2005, at 22:35:54
> My therapist has often admitted to encouraging my attachment. He dislikes the word dependency because it has negative connotations...he talks a lot about people being interdependent. We spent a lot of time this week talking about how necessary a strong attachment is to do the deep work we are doing. And only by doing the deep work will I eventually heal. This came up because a close friend was questioning the length of time I've been in therapy and motivations for continuing.
> It helped me to talk about it because often, like you wrote in your post, people tend to think negatively about strong feelings in therapy and regard dependency as a bad thing; worse, they think a therapist is being destructive by encouraging or even allowing it. The prevailing attitude is that a strong independent self must be the theraputic goal. I believe that unless you've had this kind of experience you just can't fathom the depth of it and the enormous and powerful feelings that rise up.
> It has taken me all week but I've moved to a place where I am willing to defend my attachment as necessary for me. It won't last but it feels nice right now.
This was a nice post. :-)
I'm really torn about this issue right now, feeling like I need to "move on", like I'm somehow indulging myself by continuing therapy, but I don't seem to get anywhere when I feel this way. I don't know what my T thinks about it....also I don't feel like I'm working on much of anything right now. I hate this feeling.
I didn't do the gift thing...just a card to say thank you, but it felt sort of like a goodbye. I've given some more thoughtful gifts before. I don't know. I'm having a hard time feeling attached to anything or anyone right now.