Psycho-Babble Psychology | about psychological treatments | Framed
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Allisonross

Posted by Dinah on December 11, 2005, at 9:02:24

In reply to Re: (((((((((HappyFlower)))))))))))))))))))))))))), posted by allisonross on December 10, 2005, at 12:17:53

> Hey, there! Perhaps I will decide to stay, to just see how many other tornadoes I can cause!
>
> As I tell people in my office, I have so little time, and so many more people to aggravate!
>
> Just jokin' everyone, just jokin here!!
>

I understand that was a joke. But I wonder why you chose to make it. Since it's other people's feelings that you're talking about, and they're standing right here, so to speak.

> I meant basically, as adults we can choose to say nothing if the "stuff" has nothing to do with us, or we will hurt another human being. I don't know if I am expressing this well, but I am trying.

But on the other hand, people are saying this "stuff" *does* have something to do with them. And that it *is* hurting them. As adults, we can also choose to respect and validate *their* feelings.

I'm not sure that we can get anywhere without expressing understanding of the other person(s) feelings, and regret for any pain we may be inadvertantly causing others. And I mean that for everyone.

I remember once that I was told something I wrote needed a trigger warning. And while I didn't understand it myself, I appreciated that it was important to someone else. So, perhaps with a bit of "huh?" I tried to start putting triggers on it. Since it doesn't viscerally affect me, I might slip up from time to time, but with a reminder I will be more than willing to put a trigger on those posts.

Nobody's trying to hurt you. If anything, I think the people who brought this up are doing what you call "restorative justice". Didn't you say that your therapist did something, and you told him how you felt? How is that different than what anyone on this thread did? I thought pretty much everyone bent over backwards to explain that they were expressing how *they* felt rather than to criticize.

I understand that you feel criticized, and I hope my post didn't add to that feeling. I'm hoping we can all come to a mutual understanding and appreciation of each other.

 

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Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:Dinah thread:587729
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051210/msgs/587994.html