Posted by daisym on December 4, 2005, at 20:45:43
In reply to Re: What does loyalty mean? » orchid, posted by one woman cine on December 4, 2005, at 17:19:30
It might be semantics but I don't think loyalty, love or fidelity are the same things. I don't think loyalty applies well to individuals. You might be loyal to a product or political party or TV show. Which to me means you stick with it no matter what.
I think with people we have love, commitment, friendship (though I guess I see 'loyal' friend used often enough) respect, support, attachment, forgiveness and a whole bunch of other things. Love is one of those things that expands and contracts with time, shared experiences and reciprocity. I don't think it is disloyal to love bunches of people.
Fidelity implies exclusivity in your sex life with another person. I think the concept of marriage for most of us is a promise of this. But I think emotional fidelity is important to - keeping some of those needs of care and the need to care for- exclusive to your spouse. I think sometimes people give less of themselves emotionally to their spouse, even as they remain faithful sexually. I think sadly this can be as deadly to a marriage as having an affair.
Which is why the idea of therapy can be threatening to one's spouse. Sharing such intimacy with another person goes against this idea of emotional fidelity.
Maybe I got way off track?
poster:daisym
thread:585316
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051130/msgs/585555.html