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It wasn't really about hair color, of course

Posted by All Done on September 8, 2005, at 1:50:24

I swear to you, when I was waiting in the waiting room for my T, the furthest thing from my mind was my hair. I'm sure there were plenty of reasons I wasn't thinking about it, but anyway...

I got settled in my chair and we went through our normal routine of asking each other how we are doing (only once did he say something other than "fine"). Then he opened his eyes a little wider in a delayed surprised reaction or something and said, "you colored your hair." When I confirmed, he told me it looks nice. Good man, good man :).

Then, I told him everything behind my decision not to tell him beforehand. He laughed a little when I said that I knew no matter what I decided to do, I'd have to talk to him about it.

It ended up being a pretty good session because it was an excellent transition into the fact that earlier that day my mom didn't notice/comment on the color change but instead, focused on my weight loss. That's not a bad thing in and of itself, but she immediately said it's "just like she's been doing". Maybe you can understand my frustration if I tell you she's been losing (and gaining back) the same five pounds for the last year and a half. Frankly, I'm tired of hearing about it and always having her turn any mention of my weight loss (or anything, for that matter) into a monologue about hers. It's just always been about her and her needs. Even when I was very young. (BTW, Beefcake took this opportunity to congratulate me on my weight loss. Did I tell you he's a good man?)

There was a ton more. It was mainly focused on my relationship with my mom, which I haven't talked about in a while.

An odd thing is that lately he's been commenting on the quality(?) of the things we're talking about. He'll tell me we have a lot to think about until next session or even just that "this is good, important stuff". Is this normal for other Ts? It kind of makes me wonder what I was talking about before. Or maybe there's a new or increased pressure to please him?

Anyway, I felt like I got an authentic response from him about my hair. Added bonus, it was a nice response :).

Laurie


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poster:All Done thread:552163
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