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Are you sure you're not my sister? daisym

Posted by Racer on August 4, 2005, at 23:59:42

In reply to Re: Two responses, for whatever they're worth... Racer, posted by daisym on August 4, 2005, at 23:26:06

I can't answer your question. I am trying -- with varying levels of success, and a hell of a lot of anxiety over it always -- to try to feel it. Whatever it is. Just to feel it. Just to allow myself to feel it.

So, mostly, I can feel a bit of it, with a huge amount of anxiety. And it's horrible, and it's really upsetting, and I hardly feel functional, and I thank heaven fasting every day for the love of my good man, which allows me to experience that with few outside pressures right now.

It's hard as anything I've ever done, Miss DaisyMae, but it's possible. Trust me: if I can do it, anyone can %^D

I guess, bottom line and serious, I really am trying to sit with the feelings more. Allow them, even if I don't understand them. And I'm crying a lot. I think those things go together.

Do you get the horrors over feeling as though you're "wallowing in self-pity?" All that? Get over it. It's OK to wallow in it, and to scream and throw tantrums over how unfair all of it is. You don't have to share those tantrums, you know, unless you want to.

And look at those comments as an adult looking at another adult speaking to a child: wouldn't you stop any other mother who said that to a child? Daisy -- I have stopped women in the supermarket to say it to them.




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