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Re: no talking about past?? maybe sleepygirl

Posted by gardenergirl on August 3, 2005, at 22:14:22

In reply to no talking about past?? maybe, posted by sleepygirl on August 3, 2005, at 21:49:25

> So I'm trying to talk about my adolescence, one of the more painful periods of my life. But, it seems I can't really explain it to my therapist, and I'm not really sure he wants to hear it.

You mentioned that you cannot pick up on vibes from your T about this. So it's possible that your T is not the kind who finds it valuable to talk about the past, or this could be a projection (not a bad word!) on your part that has to do with your self-esteem, maybe. Either way, you know the saying...ask about it! It's definitely grist for the mill.

> I sometimes feel like I'm a pain in the *ss dredging up the past and all.

I have had this feeling before, too. Like I'm a big whiner, and I should just "get over it." But my T never validates that feeling. He reminds me that my childhood did have really painful aspects, and this pain is still with me. I fall into the trap of saying to myself, "It wasn't THAT bad. Why am I so upset?" But he reminds me that isn't the point. The point is how it affected me, which just is. It's not something to labelled or judged. It just is. (sigh, see how I'm working on this?)

Keep working in therapy. If you and your T have a good working relationship, you'll get through this and grow. That's my perspective, but I'm on a bit of a therapy "high" right now.






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