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Touch Issues - Massage, etc - - - - MT??

Posted by jammerlich on July 12, 2005, at 17:44:13

I'm not sure if it makes any sense, but I think I have various levels of touch issues. On the most severe end, when I'm touched in certain places, there are flashbacks and ugly pictures. But I have issues with touch in general. I'm not fond of touching other people, but if someone has a need that can be met by my appropriate touch, then I can do it. I ache to be touched gently - I mean in a completely non-sexual way - but to receive it is emotionally overwhelming to the point that I fear it. How miserable is that? To be terrified of the thing you really want? I know it's not at all rational, but I believe I will contaminate people who touch me to meet my own needs (especially if they know about my past), and that people whom I touch to meet their needs will stay clean.

Ok, so on to my point..... Given all this, I have trouble with massages - well, spa treatments in general, really. I've only made it through one massage and I think it's because that particular one hurt. I'm sure part of it has to do with the touching, but I think the relaxation plays a role too. Like it's not safe to *let go* that much so I have to put a stop to it. But again, I want to so badly. Anyway, I'm going to be spending a long weekend at a fancy Four Seasons hotel with a spa that is supposed to be to die for and I want to try to use it. Have any of you who have issues with touch found some treatments you can tolerate or ways to get through them and enjoy them?

 

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poster:jammerlich thread:526822
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050706/msgs/526822.html