Posted by Damos on June 19, 2005, at 17:14:04
In reply to Re: Sharing an Email Sent to My T. (very long) » Damos, posted by 10derHeart on June 17, 2005, at 0:06:46
> I just love that term "T-mail." It's completely perfect. May I use it in the future? I want to tell my T., too - he will like it.
I would be honoured, feel free
> Thank you. But you see what I let you see on Babble. I really am doing next to nothing IRL now that makes my getting up each day mean much. I seem to have (on purpose, in some ways) dug myself into quite a messy place, socially, financially, mentally, emotionally - only spiritually can I say I'm steadily hanging on to some goodness - and for me that may make *all* the difference...I hope....
Now you see, I get up and come to work everyday, because I know I have to to get through the day. But once I'm here it all comes apart and nothing happens, nothing gets done and I feel guilty that thye pay me to just sit here and take up space without contributing. I have aproject on which I haven't lifted a finger in 2 months - just can't make myslef focus on it and it blew up in my face on Friday a week from implementation. The sad truth is that I was hoping it would. I think it was my way of waving hte white flag or crying out for help or both. Not good thought cause there's going to be hell to pay now.
> Wow. That's powerful. I can't really imagine how. Except that you shudder in disgust at all my *fine* qualities? :-( But obviously that's not what you meant. Can you describe that more? Only if you want to, though, of course.
I can only describe it as a seismic event like a small (okay not so small) internal earthquake, accompanied by a shiver and sense of intense coldness. Oh yeah, and that sense you get of something being way too close to home.
> I don't know what to say, Damos. You're something else. I just can't even respond to that. I just wish....nah, it doesn't matter right now... many warm hugs to you >> (((((Damos)))))
You don't need to say anything, being able to share space here with you is enough. I'm something else alright - just wish I knew what.
Big warm hugs right back at you.
(((((10der)))))
>
poster:Damos
thread:512970
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050615/msgs/515595.html