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Old dream, new ending (trigger warning)

Posted by daisym on June 17, 2005, at 13:36:47

I feel asleep on the couch for a few hours last night and I dreamed that I drove to the bridge and jumped off. I drove there purposefully and I was very scared but very determined. I didn't scream when I jumped, I just sort of gasped. But instead of falling, I grew wings and flew upwards. I remember being worried that my wings would get wet and not work if I went into a cloud or fog bank. There was a sense of freedom and peace in flying around, like I was leaving everything behind me.

I told my therapist about the dream. He asked me what I thought it meant. I said that I thought it meant that there was a release in death, a new start. He said he felt it was more positive than that because I didn't die. I never hit, I grew new wings and flew (a new skill) and gained a sense of freedom from that. He wondered if through all the pain something new was going to emerge and my unconscious was trying to show me that. He said it sounded like the beginnings of hope.

I wonder what you guys think? And don't worry if you agree with me, I'm not going to take that as evidence that you can find peace through death.

 

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