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Re: Bad Session with T cricket

Posted by Dinah on April 20, 2005, at 10:43:35

In reply to Re: Bad Session with T Dinah, posted by cricket on April 20, 2005, at 9:59:23

Cricket, there was a time or two when my therapist said something to that effect, but he never said it in that way. That sounds incredibly hurtful.

I can only tell you what I would do in that situation, and I have no idea if it would help because your therapist is clearly not like mine in style.

I would, and have, call him and tell him how much what he said hurt, and ask him if you could possibly schedule an earlier appointment to talk about what he said, why he said it, what he thinks of the possibilities of this relationship working. It may well be that he doesn't have the commitment to the relationship needed to work things through. But it could still possibly be a learning experience for you to see it out a bit longer and discover all you can about what went wrong.

If I were you, I'd totally discount his public manner. People's public demeanor often can't stand up to week after week of contact.

And whatever happens, you're not at fault. If he's frustrated, it's his job to seek counsel and supervision. And it's his job not to lash out at you in frustration. Mind you, my therapist has done it from time to time, but...

At any rate, you've invested three years in this relationship. You at least might get out of it some knowledge of how he perceives your interactions with him, and possibly some knowledge of the shortcomings he has that you might want to avoid in the future. It's worth another session or two to try, don't you think?

And there's something remarkably freeing about having a relationship at such a low spot that you don't have to worry as much about asking the hard questions.




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