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Re: I'm regressing :-( » messadivoce

Posted by Tamar on April 12, 2005, at 10:14:32

In reply to I'm regressing :-(, posted by messadivoce on April 12, 2005, at 0:28:18

> My T replied to my e-mail and said he was "glad I was able to hang onto the positive things I gleaned from our therapy" but didn't make any comment on how hard it has been to get to that point. Along with telling him that I'm remembering the positive, I also told him that I still have "hangover" feelings about him and I'm usually (but not always) sure that what I'm feeling now was worth the h*ll I went through. I didn't say it like that, of course.

It's good that he replied, right? Better than no reply, I would imagine.

> I was kind of annoyed because, geez, he could have acknowledged how terrible it's been for me, and he knows it too. Is he in denial??

I know what you mean. I don't think they ever really acknowledge how hard it can be. I suppose they don't ever truly understand unless they've ever been ill and in therapy.

> I guess when it comes down to it I want him to feel guilty for all the hell his inexperience put me through. I want him to miss me like I miss him.

Yeah - you want him to acknowledge his mistakes. And he might, if only privately, but he probably wouldn't tell you (especially in an email) if he feels any guilt about making mistakes. I think you probably just have to hope that he recognises why you feel the way you do, even if he won't come straight out and say so.

> I want him to need me like I need him.

It seems so unfair that we tell them so much personal stuff and we come to feel so strongly about them, and they don't relate to us in the same way. And somehow, knowing that it has to be that way for therapy to be effective doesn't make it feel any better. It still hurts.

(((((Voce)))))

I hope things get easier for you soon.

Tamar


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