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Re: talking about it mair

Posted by daisym on April 7, 2005, at 18:51:41

In reply to Re: talking about it Daisym, posted by mair on April 7, 2005, at 13:17:46

I should have said that I raise the idea of my children all the time by myself. Hence the "it will be an accident" plan. And he isn't pounding on me, he is "curious" about this or that. But he asks all the hard questions, the ones I keep asking myself.

And we talked about this today (again)-- that he is worrying. He asked if knowing that he was worried was taking away my "freedom" to talk about it -- as honestly and detailed as I wanted/needed to. It is really hard to answer, "how does knowing I'm worried make you feel?" I told him I thought he was a bit unfair over the weekend and he said, "totally." And he said with vehemence that he needed to reach me and I had moved really far away. *sigh* He said he'd rather have me mad and alive... *big sigh*

It is a horrible position I've put him in, isn't it? I shouldn't fault him. He's so totally there for me. I mean, how would I feel if he didn't address all of this, wouldn't I think he didn't care? And wouldn't that be worse?




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