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Re: Enough of it. Tamar

Posted by pinkeye on April 5, 2005, at 21:39:51

In reply to Re: Enough of it. pinkeye, posted by Tamar on April 5, 2005, at 21:22:34

Wow .. that was so wise.

Have you ever wondered how we all become very wise when it is our turn to be the ones to give advise, but just fail miserably when we need to apply it to ourselves? I feel that a lot about myself.

I don't think I am trying too hard to let him go. I have been trying to let go of him for nearly 2 and a half years now... ever since I started with him.. And I have failed failed failed again and again and again.

I do care about him. A lot. And I am attracted to him. But what is the use, when you know they are indifferent to you? And when both of you are married anyway? It just adds to the guilt.

I am done with it now anyway. I know I won't be seeing him again or talking to him again, and he won't be writing to me anymore.. So really there is no option left other than to just close the deal and move on and just hope time will fade things even more. I am tired of it. Believe me, I have really tried all these options - to not take it too hard, to try to be busy etc etc. Somehow there is a profound need in me that gets satisfied when I write to him, and I am tired of trying to find what that need is, and how I can satisfy that otherwise.

I am just giving it up.




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