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Re: suicidal ideation an addiction? *possible trig B2chica

Posted by cubic_me on April 5, 2005, at 15:57:11

In reply to suicidal ideation an addiction? *possible trigger*, posted by B2chica on April 5, 2005, at 12:35:53

I understand you completely B2C, I have had very similar feelings to you. At the moment I am hardly showing any sign of depression, except suicidal ideation.

In the last few weeks I have figured out that often I think of suicide when I need to know there is an escape route (not neccessaraly death), for example if I am finding a lecture extremely boring, images of throwing myself down the lecture theatre stairs will pop into my mind and seem very appealing. Similarly when I am in a room full of people and do not feel like socialising I will look longingly at the window and think of jumping out of it.

When I am depressed, these thoughts are much more severe and troublesome, and while some are clearly because I want to die, others seem to have little basis in that, or the need for attention (except maybe self-attention and the need to show myself how much I am hurting).

I tend to try to let these thoughts drift over me now, as I know they will be there for a while and I don't have a T to work them through with. That method is working for me at the moment.

It sounds like you have a great T there - use him all you can in the time you have, I'm sure he will be of great benefit to you :)




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