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Re: Why can't I apply it to myself? Racer

Posted by SLS on April 3, 2005, at 22:07:07

In reply to Re: Why can't I apply it to myself? SLS, posted by Racer on April 3, 2005, at 14:52:15

Hey Racer.

> > How does assigning responsibility to the irresponsible make things any better?
> >
> > Isn't it easier to accept the event as it happened and know that it was not your fault?

> Ha! The problem, my darling Scotters, is that I still think it was *my* fault! Every time I try to say that it wasn't my fault, that ugly voice comes up in my head pointing out all the things I "should" have done to avoid having this happen.

Don't should all over yourself.

Of course, it is your responsibity to know everything about how the Universe works so that you can be prepared for any situation that arises. If you should fail, it must therefore be your fault. You probably didn't do your homework. Age is no excuse.

> The bottom line, of course, is that I'm somehow fundamentally wrong and therefore it was my fault.

I think I understand.

> That's a very common theme for me, by the way. That whatever it is was and is and ever will be my fault.

I'm sure someone has revealed to you that you are not so important as to be able to weild such power over the rest of the world. :-)

> (Real sorry about the tsunami, guys... Don't know what got into me.) I guess what I was hoping for in this post wasn't to shift the "blame" onto the other people involved, so much as finding a way to shift it *off* myself. Does that make sense?


What do you think gets in the way of your shifting blame off yourself for those things that you had little or no control over? Never mind. I guess I'm beginning to cross some boundaries here.

> One difficulty I have, though, with what has come through is that as soon as I hear the part about no one being assigned the role of protector, I immediately do the self-blame dance, where I failed to protect myself.

You DID fail to protect yourself. This is a fact. Now what?

Whether you tried and failed for weakness or failed to try for fear, you still acted as best you could at the time, and well within the norms of human experience. Blame. I guess you can blame yourself for being like everyone else. Welcome to the club of humanity.

Perhaps you feel that there is something fundamentally wrong with you, and thus you always choose to do the wrong things for yourself and those around you. Every move you make is wrong. Yet, you can't figure out what you are doing wrong. It is a mystery to you.

Does this apply at all? I used to suffer this myself.

I'm sorry. I go too far sometimes.

- Scott




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