Posted by Susan47 on February 21, 2005, at 14:58:27
In reply to Re: The next subject, posted by Susan47 on February 19, 2005, at 20:21:32
This is about sex so it may trigger but it's not bad sex, it's just sex.
I figured out when I get stoned, like a couple of puffs and sometimes more, than I get really ... ahem ... (whispering this) horny. Ugly word, that.
But wow, what a feeling! So what I always always always do is remember the look of my ex-T's skin. He has lovely skin, it has a wonderful colour to it, and it glows a bit. He gives it life, it's amazing how some people can do that, they have that special something that sets them apart from everybody else. Well, actually, EVERYBODY has that, and we all have it in different ways. But I guess this skin thing is one of the ones that attracts me the most. That and eyes, I love good eyes. He's got great eyes (giggle).
Anyway, so what I always do when I get in this state of remembering, and loving that, is I pick up the phone and listen. In the past I used to leave messages saying what I was feeling, but I learned I had to stop that. I think it bothered him because he was always super-cold to me after that. So now I pick up the phone and just listen and then hang up, which is better; not perfect, but better anyways.
I can restrict my smoking. I feel like I can start to do that now. I don't have to live with those intense, incredible feelings as much as I used to. I don't think I do anyway. The first three words of that last sentence are an oxymoron. Hmh.
poster:Susan47
thread:459925
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050218/msgs/461388.html