Posted by antigua on February 4, 2005, at 21:13:27
In reply to Re: Merry Go Rounds Daisy, posted by Daisym on February 4, 2005, at 11:18:11
I never tried that possibly delectable combination...
I have one favorite picture which is probably right about when the abuse started if not just later. I'm sitting on the "settee" in my grandmother's house, all dressed up for Easter. No hat in this one, thank goodness. I can pinpoint the time because my hair was cut short. I had impossibly long, messy hair (big trigger for me) until my mother just chopped it off. It was such a relief, so there couldn't be in anything in my hair anymore. I had gotten a really huge knot I couldn't get out, which I thought was very evil and dirty and marked me for what I was. When the hair was cut, I felt I had come "clean" and was clean, clean, clean.
I still don't like anyone coming near or working on my hair. It was a tangled mess and left w/me with a lot of shame.
I love that picture because I look happy and confident. I'm going to fnd the good parts of that girl and recapture her confidence. In the older pictures I can clearly see the depression--it just screams to me and Iwant to know why nobody questioned it!!
So, I'm focusing on that sweet little girl and helping her figure things out.
I had a thought for you. You seem to want to give all the girls their equal due, but maybe it has to be in fits and starts w/each one. They don't have to have equal time, maybe, if one is just more intense or impatient at the moment. I'm going to try to just go w/the flow, but it's important for me to pay attention to them right now.