Posted by shrinking violet on October 7, 2004, at 20:16:23
In reply to Re: I quit therapy- Feeling Very Sad (Long) » Poet, posted by lookdownfish on October 7, 2004, at 17:41:17
{{{{{poet}}}}}
Oh.My.God.
I could have written your ENTIRE post, word-for-word.
I've quit therapy periodically over the past year with my T; each time, I started to panic a day or so later, cried, afraid that I screwed up the one thing that might have been good for me (even if indirectly). Therapy is SO hard for me....I have major trouble verbalizing. Even when I write stuf down (and I can write pages and pages of stuff) it's still hard for me to talk about it afterwards. My poor T has read so much stuff from me. My T is the only person who has genuinely cared and tries to make sure I know it and feel it. She's the first person I truly care about too, and it's a weird and scary thing sometimes. Yet, as great/special/close as our relationship is, it is STILL a therapeutic one, and again, I'm not so great at the therapy part.
Mostly when I quit therapy, a big part of it is feeling that my T would want me to leave, or that it would be better for her if I did so. Did that play a part in your decision to quit at all? Did you quit for you, or for your T?
As hard as this is for you, part of you needs your T, needs the relationship, needs *something* from the therapy, or else you wouldn't be so upset. I wish I could articulate it better, because I truly know what a conflict it is.
If you dont feel better in a day or so, please go see your T, or at least call her. It's ok to say you made a mistake, and to go back and try again.
Email me if you need/want to talk, ok? :)
Take care hon. I hope you find peace soon.
-SV
poster:shrinking violet
thread:400053
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041002/msgs/400176.html