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Re: Birthday gift for T? OK or no? Dinah

Posted by Lonely on August 20, 2004, at 20:10:21

In reply to Re: Birthday gift for T? OK or no? shrinking violet, posted by Dinah on August 20, 2004, at 19:12:18

You've touched on something that has been in the back of my mind so I'd like to get some feedback from you and others if that's ok.

I too have fought w/T's (especially the one who died) and been bored by them - even grossed out. My current thinking is that if it feels like a hassle or if it feels like it's boring then it is. And, I look for another one if I don't feel better about the T after bringing it up (which is hard to do).

Ok, no doubt there's a much different point of view to that and I think you might have experienced it. So, what is the value of going through the hassle? In my case I can't honestly say it helped me with other relationships unless deciding finally to say 'nough and move on is the answer. After all, I'm paying for therapy.

So, when to leave and when not to leave - that is the question.


> I always say that my therapist and I fought our way to relationship. .... Every phase of the relationship brought its share of challenges. We spent a fair amount of our time for years hammering out compromises, learning to understand and value each other's point of view. I'm not at all sorry I did it, but sometimes I wonder who taught who more about commitment. :)
>
> Even now, in the therapeutic equivilant of the old married couple phase, challenges come up from time to time. How much support, how much challenge.


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poster:Lonely thread:378642
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