Posted by Pfinstegg on August 14, 2004, at 20:40:09
In reply to Re: for Aphrodite » Pfinstegg, posted by Aphrodite on August 14, 2004, at 20:01:12
Oh, I'm glad it was OK to write that, and that it really meant something to you. I was afraid it sounded kind of silly, though it was very meaningful to me. It's only just recently that I can let go enough so that she speaks. Before that, I always said just what you say- "she might say.." or " I guess she thinks.." My analyst helps tremendously with this, by always being a bit ahead of me in speaking directly to the girl. He takes care to use simple language, and a gentle. comforting voice, and he knows all the good things about the girl's life- like the brooks and farm animals, frogs and salamanders, spring flowers and the ancient horse who used to lie down if anyone got on his back, and brings those up to help her get started. I could see him doing that for months, but still was not ready to let my guard down enough to allow the girl to really speak. She was dreading what would happen after she had talked about the good things- how bad were the bad things going to be? Now, she and I know that when she's ready, it won't be unbearable- we can go back and forth, from *her* to *me*, both my T and I knowing which one is speaking, and that each part is real. As it happens, we do run the gamut of fear, pain and sorrow, but there is also joy and delight. I really know, now, that doing this kind of therapy can lift those terrible burdens which abuse inflicts on us- I can feel it happening, bit by bit, but it's QUITE SLOW.
I mentioned a couple of interactions which meant a lot to me- one terrifying, and one fun and happy. I would love it if others would do the same!
poster:Pfinstegg
thread:376265
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040812/msgs/377742.html