Posted by Shadowplayers721 on August 5, 2004, at 23:55:07
In reply to My sis - and an explanation, posted by AuntieMel on August 5, 2004, at 9:53:57
I can imagine the shock of having your sis with surgery. My sister had a routine abdominal surgery and had 3 pulmonary blood clots. It scared us all to death! She is okay now. I hope your sis makes a rapid recovery.
The experience that you shared was powerful. AuntieMel, I feel that I have done what you have done here, but what I realized is it wasn't really about that other person/object/issue. It was really about my old very painful feelings. I was projecting my undealt with pain in a safer fashion. Please, let me explain.
Actually, I did it with an old house this past year. I passed up a beautiful antique home over a 100 y/o one day and noticed it was being torn down board by board. I told my husband to stop and I went in it and my feelings were just overwhelming. I was crying about what I saw. It was once gorgeous and it was ransacked by vandals. The owner totally neglected the gorgeous two story home on a beautiful piece of land with wonderful oak trees. I contacted the owner and told him my feelings. I called several organizations. I even wrote a poem and put it in the paper dedicated to the old house. But, all this was really was about was I projected my pain of feeling of not be loved, neglected, useless, and abused as a child onto that house. While this may not be the exact feelings you felt with this powerful memory, at least you know what memory it is. I went around for months trying to save the unsavable. I am sure subconsciously I knew this. Seems crazy now, but I try not to think about it. I mean .. I might write another poem. NOOOOO!!! Stop it! Shadows! It is easy to get caught up in somethings..... Where's that owners phone #? Stop!! BREATH! 1....2....3...It's a diversion ... Steering the wheel to get back on track again.. Whew!!!
I feel you have a heart of gold. We are all just posters writing back and forth and like Kali stated - make the focus -taking care of your needs now.;-)
Darn, I need to do some exercise or something. That was just overwhelming. What was I NNOOOOOO!
poster:Shadowplayers721
thread:373706
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040805/msgs/374566.html