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Re: Reading your Therapist's signals DaisyM

Posted by Pfinstegg on July 1, 2004, at 23:25:20

In reply to Re: Reading your Therapist's signals Pfinstegg, posted by DaisyM on July 1, 2004, at 21:13:15

Your T. seems to be saying exactly what mine is saying. He just recently commented that psychoanalysis had completely reversed itself about interactions and enactments between patients and analysts. It used to be, maybe 30 or more years ago, that there weren't supposed to be any of those- and now they are considered the most important thing that happens! It seems hard to believe that I am lying there telling him just what I am feeling and thinking about him, over and over, and he is listening very carefully, reacting quite spontaneously and often according to the thoughts and feelings which my feelings and thoughts produce in him. It is a lot like how a mother and baby interact- heightening all sorts of feelings, and then calming and regulating them. I'm not especially brave at all- he is very kind and trustworthy; if he weren't, I wouldn't be able to do it.

I do know what you mean about having uncomfortable, worrisome endings before weekends. I think it's because we are allowing such young and dependent parts of ourselves to be *there*, and, for those parts, endings and interruptions can seem almost catastrophic. I wasn't aware of how true this was until I saw how he always made a point of talking about them at length. For example, when he went on vacation to Ireland recently, we spent the entire week prior to that talking about how terrible, angry and abandonned I felt that he would do such a thing to me! Then we were able to shake hands and have a positive parting for ten days- it just took a week of work to get to that point! - and even then, it wasn't very easy. I'm just becoming a lot more cognizant and respectful of how powerful these infantile forces are- in me, and I'm assuming, everyone who has had a difficult childhood. I do give him a lot of credit for understanding it so well, and for helping me understand it.


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