Posted by tinydancer on June 2, 2004, at 10:08:35
In reply to Comments on Appearance in Therapy, posted by Miss Honeychurch on May 31, 2004, at 20:20:02
This is a really interesting topic, Miss Honey! I liked hearing about the differences from each and every one of you. I have a male therapist, and he actually isn't much older than me (I think 5 years or so?)
When I have appointments I am always dressed in my best or newest outfit (but of course!) and I am really happy if he comments, but he doesn't make a habit of it. I'm really into fashion and trends and stuff so sometimes he comments "Wow, your earrings match your socks!!" He's said a few times, "Look at you!" when I'm really fancy. He told me once that I had a very nice smile. (That's actually such a nice compliment, isn't it?) Also, I've asked him if he thinks I'm pretty. But I've also asked him if he thinks I'm boring, smart, if I talk to much, if he is proud of me and so on, so for me its just part of the territory really.
I think it just varies from T to T. I don't think it is a problem to give people compliments. In fact I was discussing this at my T today: the fact that giving someone a compliment is positive, sort of like, "Share the love!" I understand Dinah's dilemma and agree that it is usually best to just comment on how they look "especially nice" today or something, without implying that they don't always. I recently commented to someone that they looked thinner forgetting she had once had bulimia. Woops...Slippery slope indeed!
poster:tinydancer
thread:352524
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040522/msgs/352988.html