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Re: Antigua - EMDR experience? » partlycloudy

Posted by antigua on May 28, 2004, at 17:42:52

In reply to Antigua - EMDR experience?, posted by partlycloudy on May 28, 2004, at 15:04:59

Yes, I've been doing it now for, wow, seven months. Didn't realize it had been that long. I have a separate T for this. I see the EMDR T on Tuesday and my regular T on Wed so there isn't much lag time between them (so I can quickly deal w/what comes up).

My experiences are kind of different w/EMDR, at least they differ from what I hear other people say. It's supposed to especially work for concrete traumatic events, isolated experiences that have either been forgotten or are stuck and the patient isn't able to get over them. It doesn't work quite that way for me. I remember/relive feelings of how I felt when the abuse was happening. I haven't been able to go any deeper into the abuse yet (still pretty deep, though). It's amazing but I actually feel how I felt as a young girl.

The major things that have come out for me are that I discovered I had more than one abuser and I found my "evil" twin who I mentioned in another thread.

Most times I feel like I'm watching a movie unfold, with someone else (disassociation) as the major actor. But I do feel, which is unusual for me, especially the heartbreak and the sadness. I still haven't connected to the physical acts and/or pain.

I don't really understand how it works, or if I'm even doing it right. I told my T I wanted to stop the other day because I didn't think it was doing any more good and the next week I discovered I had two little girls instead of just one. I was fighting it, I can see that now.

So, that's my epxerience w/EMDR. It has moved my therapy along, which has been great for me as I was frustrated at being so stuck.

If you have any other questions, feel free to ask. Good luck.
antigua


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