Psycho-Babble Psychology | about psychological treatments | Framed
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Hot fudge? All Done

Posted by fallsfall on May 26, 2004, at 10:17:54

In reply to 2 scoops, extra whipped cream and a cherry, please, posted by All Done on May 26, 2004, at 0:51:16

You forgot to ask for the hot fudge? Is that because it is such an obvious part of the solution that you didn't think you needed to mention it? (please don't tell me that you want Cream of Wheat on your ice cream instead of hot fudge) I will share my hot fudge with you.

It sounds like your therapist has a plan for private patients who aren't being helped by insurance. He wouldn't be making a special exception for you, so you don't have to feel guilty about it or worry about it being counter-transference.

I was trying to find an analogy that would help your husband understand why one therapist isn't the same as another therapist. I don't think I like these analogies, but here they are anyway. He has a mother (I hope) - would he choose to stop being her son and be adopted by a new mother? The new mother might be better or worse than his current mother - it really isn't possible to tell until you have gone down the road a bit. But the new mother will absolutely be *different* from his current mother. Or if he has had a best friend for many years (though this might work better to convince women than to convince men), he could trade his friend in for a new friend. But the new friend wouldn't know all of his history.

News like this is always shocking. Let it sink in a bit before you even start to make decisions about it.

Take comfort in knowing that he has given you some time to deal with the change. Take comfort in knowing that he *does* still want to work with you.

It sounds like it might be an option to tell your husband that you would like to plan to keep seeing your current therapist after he moves - maybe on a "temporary" basis? - so that you and your therapist have a chance to figure out what really is the best option (and/or transition plan) for you. This way you could feel that you have time to figure out the best decision.

If you don't want any of my hot fudge that is OK - I *am capable* of eating it all myself. But I would be happy to share.





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