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Re: 2 scoops, extra whipped cream and a cherry, please

Posted by gardenergirl on May 26, 2004, at 8:32:27

In reply to Re: 2 scoops, extra whipped cream and a cherry, please All Done, posted by DaisyM on May 26, 2004, at 1:25:25

All Done,

How awful. I'm sorry you are dealing with this. I'm sorry your husband is having trouble understanding. Like Daisy said, unless they have been through it, it's just a puzzle to them. From what you described, this has you all stirred up, but remember, you have until August to make a decision. Try to take some comfort in that. That also gives you a lot of time to prepare for a transfer if needed.

I know that stinks, if that's what ends up happening. Let me tell you a bit about my experiences with transfers (as a trainee). Just to give you some perspective. If you're not ready to think about this, feel free to stop reading. I won't mind.

I've done a number of transfers with my clients, and had some transferred to me this time last year. Pretty much no one wants to transfer. I can say that in many cases it worked out okay. A couple did not, and they chose not to come back either without meeting me or after a few sessions with me. It helps to talk about the transfer and your feelings of loss and anxiety. It helps to talk about it a few different times. Because at first it might be raw. Then you settle into getting to know the new T and them getting to know you. At this point, it helps to talk again about the transfer, because feelings can get pushed aside as you try to get to work.

It CAN work to do this. But it is sad. It is a loss. And it does feel like you have lost ground and are starting over. But in many cases, you find that you can build on what you had before with your other T.

But hopefully, this won't be relevant to you, because you, your husband, and your T will be able to come to some arrangement that will work for all.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for that outcome!






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